Why
by sktrgrl13
Summary: Why? That was the only question that he was able to ask...he couldn't understand as much as he couldn't say goodbye. After all, no matter how much they fought, he was still his brother.


**Disclaimer: Mashima-sensei owns Fairy Tail and Rascal Flatts owns 'Why' :)**

**Warnings: Mentions of sacrifice, language, Minor spoilers for recent chapter**

He was confused.

He was angry.

But most of all he was hurt.

No matter how much he thought about it, he couldn't understand why he did it.

Natsu found himself sitting on the lush green grass; a light autumn wind blowing through his pink hair. He stared blankly at the remnants of the river that used to ebb and flow down the dry canyon. The majority of his memories rested at this very bank; it was where he fought, where he got stronger, and where he met his truest rival and closest friend. Natsu curled his warm appendages into the grass; subconsciously fighting the fire that threatened to rage out of control. It had been a long, long time since he had ever been this devastated; he had thought that he would never have to face something like this again.

He fought so hard to keep his family safe; yet, he inevitably failed.

He closed his eyes and breathed the fresh air through his sensitive nose. Sometimes, he swore that he could still catch the scent that used to follow him around; sometimes, it was like he had never left. Natsu thought that he had managed to escape the darkness that seemed to engulf his entire being, his entire life, but apparently he was wrong. It looked as if he couldn't see the light that was reaching for him through the stormy clouds. He should've known…

Gray _knew_ that everyone in Fairy Tail was there for him; he knew that they were his family and would protect him from anything. However, it was because of this that he had given anything in his power to keep all of them safe. Natsu flinched at the thought; he was willing to bet that Gray never wanted his sacrifice to draw as much attention as it did. Unless he was fighting, the raven didn't like to have much attention on him; he preferred to stand in the distance and watch over his family…at least until he would force himself into the spotlight by spontaneously stripping out of his clothes.

Natsu chuckled under his breath, but it turned into a choke as a sob attempted to break through his walls. That was something Gray was good at; he was always the one to don a mask and hide his feelings. Of course, all of Fairy Tail has their own types of masks, but none have been more effective than that of Gray Fullbuster. If it weren't for the mission on Galuna Island, he wouldn't have known about Ur or Lyon or Deliora…the ice mage was just that good at hiding his emotions. He couldn't help but think that if he was able to burn through Gray's frozen heart, he would've been able to do something, anything, to stop him from sacrificing himself.

God…he wished he knew what went wrong…

He thought that he had gotten through to Gray on Galuna Island; he _told _him to stop running away…he told him to live. Natsu growled under his breath as he tore the helpless out of the ground and threw it into the wind. He promised that he would never use that spell again…he _promised_ to walk a path where he could live with his comrades. It was just like the scaredy cat popsicle to run away and leave everyone behind!

Natsu closed his eyes and pressed his forehead to his knees; who was he trying to kid? Gray was never like that…he didn't run away and that was the problem. He didn't run away when he should have, but he should've expected; Gray was never one to walk away in the middle of a battle. He sniffled as tears threatened to escape; damn that ice block for doing this to him. They were brothers…they had each other's back… now he couldn't help but feel naked.

"Natsu."

The pinkette jumped slightly at the strained yet soothing voice. He slowly raised his head and glanced beside him to see none other than Erza. It's been a long time since someone was able to sneak up on him; even if that person was Erza. Usually he could hear the sound of her armour moments before she made her appearance; that is, of course, if he wasn't distracted by a certain exhibitionist. He quickly realized that Erza wasn't actually looking at him; instead, she was also staring at the waterless river.

"You know better than to disappear like that," She scolded lightly, "Especially after…"

"I know," He cut her off, "But…I had to get away, you know?"

She nodded her head,

"Yes, I know…but you could've at least told Happy where you went; he's worried sick."

Natsu bit his lip guiltily and trained his eyes on the river once more. Silence consumed them as memories of the previous days continued to haunt their exhausted minds. He wouldn't be the first to admit it, but he was tired; he hadn't had a true night's rest since that day. That day, he lost his rival, his friend and his brother; he lost a part of himself that he would never get back. Hell, he was sure that a gaping hole would be left in the heart of Fairy Tail for the rest of time. Clouds danced across the autumn sky as Erza spoke softly.

"I'll always keep him frozen as a nine year old…"

The pinkette furrowed in curiosity,

"What do you mean Erza?"

The red head tilted her head to the side for a moment,

"Have I ever told you how Gray and I became friends?"

Natsu thought back to all the time he spent at Fairy Tail only to realize that he never _did _learn how Erza and Gray became friends. Back then he only cared about two things: finding Igneel and getting stronger; though, he eventually added Lisanna, Happy and the other members of Fairy Tail to that list. He just assumed that Erza and Gray were always together; after all, that was how he met them. He shook his head frantically and stared up at his older sister figure with intrigue.

"It happened right here at this river," She smiled, "Back then I only saw his as an annoyingly loud stripper who wouldn't leave me alone."

"Glad to know that Gray didn't change too much before I met him." Natsu joked weakly.

The red head's bottom lip seemed to twitch,

"That was Gray for you; stupidly boisterous and extremely loyal."

Natsu grunted in agreement as he waited for Erza to continue on with her story. After a few moments Erza slowly lowered herself to the ground and pulled her knees up to her chest. Cold metal of Erza's shoulder armour pressed up against his arm, but he didn't move away from it; it created something that he knew that he wouldn't feel again.

"When I first met him," Erza began, "He had kicked over my table at the Fairy Tail Guild, destroyed my lunch and demanded why I wore armour if I was in a magic guild; I of course called him a pervert and ignored him. However, that never stopped him from trying to fight me every day; even if I beat him to a bloody pulp. I could never understand him, I mean why would someone want to get beaten every day?

"One day, I managed to avoid him and came to this river to think about my past and what I could have done to change it; to prevent it from happening. When Gray, in all his underwear wearing glory came running down the hill demanding that I fight him and claiming that he would beat me this time; only for him to realize that he had caught me crying."

Natsu couldn't help but smile ruefully at that; he could only imagine Gray's reaction to something like that. The ice mage was never one to handle girls' tears all too well; it made him awkward and nervous.

"What did he do?"

Erza sniffled and her voice seemed to catch in her throat,

"He asked me why I was alone all the time and if I felt better off that way, why was I crying? He then walked over to me sat in front of the river and told me that he refused to fight me because he couldn't fight a girl when she was crying…he was the first person in what felt like ages of loneliness to open up my armoured heart."

Natsu watched the red head sadly as a tear managed to flow down her cheek. How the ice bastard could so willingly give his life without thinking about how it would affect everyone else was beyond him. He closed his eyes for a moment before his amber eyes once again landed on the river. Natsu raised one of his hands in front of his face and allowed a ball of fire to erupt onto his palm.

"His magic was so beautiful…" He mumbled absently.

Erza seemed to stiffen from beside him in surprise,

"What did you say?"

Natsu's shoulders sagged as he rested his forehead against his forearms as they rested on his knees. He couldn't believe that it took Gray dying to finally admit that not only was the ice mage's magic beautiful, but it was powerful as well. Natsu's own magic was often strengthened by his emotions seeing as they were always so out of control, but Gray's magic was different. Gray was able to use his emotions to push passed his 'limits', beat the odds and defeat an opponent who _seemed_ to be stronger than he was; like when he fought Lyon, when he saved him from Fukuro and when he exacted his vengeance on Rufus in the Grand Magic Games.

"He always fought with so much passion," He found himself saying, "No matter who he fought; me, you, Lyon or an enemy he always fought with such conviction…he always found a way to shine like ice reflecting the sun."

The pinkette flushed at the cheesiness of his words; only Gray would be able to make him say stupid stuff like that. Before he could react, he felt an armoured arm wrap around his shoulder and pull him to the side; he grimaced as his head connected with a familiar metal plate of armour. He was about to complain when he felt drops of water rain down onto his pink hair. His hands balled into fists; Gray said that he wouldn't do anything to make Erza cry…he's been breaking a lot of promises lately.

Just as he felt the heat spread to his palms once more, the cool autumn wind splayed across his skin. He lifted his face off Erza's armours as the golden sun broke through the clouds and shone down on the both of them. Despite his tangled thoughts, the sweet sound of mockingbirds singing reached his sensitive ears; it made him think of how the world really wasn't too bad of a place.

"Why?" He whispered.

"Natsu?" Erza stared at him in confusion; the last of her tears drying on her face.

"I don't understand…" He hissed, "_Why_ would he sacrifice himself like that?!"

"Because he loved us Natsu," She smiled sadly, "He loved us and wanted us to live our lives…"

The dragon slayer jumped to his feet and glared at the ground,

"But what about what we wanted?!"

Erza stared up at him; her mouth hanging open uselessly. Natsu could tell that she wanted to say something, anything, to calm him down. His chest heaved as anger and self-hatred flowed through his veins, he couldn't understand. The red flames licked his forearms as he tried to comprehend why Gray would perform _that spell_ in order to save them; in order to save all of them.

"Natsu," She finally said, "I know that you don't understand, none of us will ever truly understand his reasoning; but, we can't judge him or try to find a way to explain it…if any of us were in his position we would've done the same."

He looked away from her and walked over to the dried up river; his fingers playing with the dry grass that lingered at the riverbed. He knew where she was coming from because yes, if he were in Gray's position he wouldn't have hesitated in giving his life to save his nakama. In that way, Gray would've been in his position, wondering why he had given up his life. However, there was one _burning _question that lingered in the forefront of his mind; a question that had been eating him up from the moment that Gray cast Iced Shell and sealed Silver, no Deliora, in a case of impenetrable ice.

"I just want to know…" He growled, "I just want to know who told him life wasn't worth the fight."

He pounded his fist into the ground angrily; fire exploding from his fist like a shock wave,

"They were wrong and they lied! I'm going to hunt down whoever filled that thick, ice-filled head of his with that crap and beat those bastards to a bloody pulp! They'll regret the day that they ever went against Fairy Tail!"

Erza got to her feet and went to place her hand on his shoulder,

"Everything's going to be okay; it'll take time, but…"

"NO!" He roared, "NOTHING WILL EVER BE THE SAME!"

The red head froze; her brown eyes widened in disbelief. His own eyes had finally given into the tears; the salty water spilled down his face like a waterfall. Natsu's flames expanded around him as his emotions took over; the pain, the hate, the anger, the sadness and the hurt.

"HE'S GONE ERZA!" He cried, "HE'S GONE AND HE'S NOT COMING BACK! HE WON'T COME WALKING INTO THE GUILD AS IF HE OWNS THE WORLD AND HE WON'T BE AROUND FOR JUVIA TO FAUN OVER! HE WON'T BE THERE TO HELP MIRA AT THE BAR AND HE WON'T BE THERE TO GIVE HAPPY FISH WHEN I'M NOT THERE!

"H-HE…He w-won't be there to keep Loke's playboy tendencies under of control and he won't be there to steal Lucy's stories and read them behind her back. He won't be there drinking with Cana or joking with Macao and Wakaba. He won't be there stripping down to his birthday suit during the most serious of conversations and he won't be there giving you his slice of strawberry cake. He won't be there on our missions and he won't be there to watch all of us grow up and eventually have families of our own…

"No matter what we try to do, nothing will ever bring our brother back to us; _nothing _will bring my brother back to me."

With a final punch into the ground, the earth began to quiver underneath him. He watched in awe as the ground cracked and a spout of water erupted into the air like a water fountain. He was faintly aware of Erza standing stock still beside him; her sniffles barely heard above the sound of the water rising in the once dry riverbed. Absently, Natsu dug his hand into his pocket and pulled out a familiar silver cross on a long silver chain; the last thing that they were able to find of Gray.

"Gray," He whispered, "It's not like you to walk away…"

Natsu hesitantly untangled his heated fingers and let go of the final trinket of his brother; the last of his icy touch radiating off the metal…

_I'm sorry Natsu…Erza…everyone at Fairy Tail; I'm sorry that I couldn't stay with you…but never forget, that I'll continue watching you._

"Yeah," He smiled, "I knew it wasn't like you to walk away from us."

END

**Hi Minna! I'd first like to say that this was a request given to me by Iceprinceryuu; so I hope you like this! It was my first non-romance/yaoi… hopefully it doesn't disappoint anyone too much :) Secondly, this chapter came to life from an awesome song called 'Why' by Rascal Flatts which I highly recommend you listen to and the most recent chapter of Fairy Tail which was the most OMFG WTF moment that Fairy Tail has ever had! I TOTALLY DIDN'T SEE THAT COMING! I HONESTLY DIED WHEN I FOUND OUT WHO SILVER WAS! D:**

**(Hopefully Gray doesn't make this story reality; don't use Iced Shell Gray! Don't do it!)**

**Waiting on your awesome reviews! :)**

**-sktrgrl**


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